A few months back I was celebrating my latest accomplishment. I had joined my son in observing lent and gave up desserts. My doctor noted that yes I am aging and maybe I should think of cutting back a little on the bad stuff. Specifically, all the sugars I ingest. Seeing that my son willingly, without any prompting, gave up chocolate Oreos (and that’s pretty much his one sweet thing) I figured I could show similar strength.  And strength I did show.  I managed to give it all up. I was good and I was proud.

I lastly several months past Lent. Then I craved a dessert here and there. Then, I started being more and more a car passenger in Los Angeles infamous  (rightly so) stop and go traffic. I get extreme car sickness. The jerky traffic movement plus the horrible air quality in LA, drove me (pun intended) to eat gummy worms again. I don’t eat a whole bag of Gummies in one sitting, as I have been known to do in the past, but I am back to eating them. There went my last bit of reserve.

Growing up I was allowed to eat candy. I would save up my very little money and go to the penny store and buy Now and Laters. Boy did I love those. Then, a summer I spent canvassing (professional begging) in Boston where I lived off of $75 a week for full time hours I ended up eating bags of skittles to tide me over. I’m not saying all this to be sad. Nor to be oddly nostalgic. It is just to showcase my candy history. It’s like that episode in Gilmore Girls where Lorelai is excited about the beginning of the snow season because of her rich history with snow that never let her down.

Sugar has been good to me. I have written odes to sugary treats. But I will readily admit there have been instances in which sugar has let me down. Namely, in the form of cavities. But almost everyone has had at least one cavity in their lifetime, right? Even with fluoridated water. Which now research is starting to show may not be the super great public health intervention it was meant to be. Considering also the high type 2 diabetes rate around the world, sugar has left many people down.  Boy, this has become a downer and folks, that was not my intention. I love sugar like a schoolgirl. My son hates sugary things for the most part. How can he be my son? But my sister, nieces, and mom have all loved sugar.

I can’t say with any certainty whether sugar gives me an energy  boost. I can say it can make me happy at times. It makes my taste buds happy. It makes my stomach happy. It me and my ego happy.

This past week has seen me revel in the loneliness of sugar. I’ve had gummy worms, cheesecake, Creme Brule, caramel apple pie, cherry pie,  sea salt caramel, coconut baklava, and strawberry sorbet.

I’m being bad. And I am proud.

(In all deference to my doctor next week, I will go back to moderation)
(Also I do refuse to eat Candy Corn)