Sorry, I forgot to give you the mayonnaise

There are at times certain phrases or conversation snippets that get stuck in your mind. The equivalent of earworms but different. Lewis Black has the best skit on this and at least once a year I mention it. The skit notes “if it wasn’t for my horse, I wouldn’t have spent that year in college.” That phrase has stayed with me for a really long time.

There are many other interesting, mind-numbing, head-scratching phrases out there. When I hear them, I write them down for future use. And, this tidbit is about one such phrase. Or rather, more of a mystery.

Apparently, I overheard the phrase “Sorry, I forgot to give you the mayonnaise.” It seems normal. But because I wrote it down, it must not have been an on-point part of the conversation. First off, I don’t like mayonnaise. Thus, it can’t have been directed to me. At least, not in a restaurant. Or any other place. Except for maybe 10th grade chemistry class. Or was that 7th grade? Or both. I seem to remember making mayonnaise at some point back then. It was horrible smelling. Second, if not in a restaurant where could I have been told this apology? It’s an odd apology to say the least.

I have gone through my memory bank 100 times. Then I decided to google thd phrase. Lo and behold I found it. This mayonnaise phrase is the last line of the novel Trout Fishing in America (1967) by Richard Brautigan. A silly and whimsical piece. A silly and whimsical line, especially if taken out of context. And, maybe that was the whole point of me writing it down so that I could write about it. It can certainly be a beginning, middle, or end sentence of any of our stories.

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