He looked so sad that I don’t like beans


I eat out often which is why I get food poisoning once a year. More or less. To avoid food poisoning and ending up in the emergency room, there are certain things I avoid. I never go near the salad bar, buffets in general and I stay away from Eggs Benedict. Well, basically anything with a creamy sauce. The Eggs Benedict tip I got from Anthony Bourdain’s book Kitchen Confidential. I love that book, by the way. One of my favorites, I was so wrapped up in it when I first read it. Back then I was living in New York City, and for sure, much of what he said was quite evident there. But anyway, Let me get back to eating as opposed to reading.


This past week, I tried out a new Mexican restaurant. It was an upscale fusion type of restaurant. I had been avoiding it for a while because it is so close to home. I often want to eat someplace somewhat far so that I feel like I am having a cool, eating out experience. Weird, I know.   Or maybe not. The restaurant was very cool inside and the menu was fabulous. They even had wonderfully tasty Mojitos.

I soon became fast friends with the waiter. But not because he was such a great waiter. He was, though. But because he was amused and bemused by my eating habits. Or rather one habit, in particular. When he asked me which entree I wished to have, I noted my choice and then advised him that I did not want beans. He tilted his head and his eyes widened.


“No beans?”

“Correct, no beans”

“No beans? How can that be? ”


And the conversation continued that way for a few more seconds. I explained that while I am Hispanic I do not eat beans. He was shocked. In all his time as a waiter there no one had requested to have NO beans. I couldn’t believe that. From there we established a rapport. More specifically, from his sadness at my anti-bean stance, we started talking and getting to know one another. Well, somewhat. He did have to attend to other guests.


It is fun to see what it is that drives people together. It isn’t always about the things we have in common. I know these days there is much divisiveness, but differences can be bonding as well.

12 replies »

  1. Yes precisely! I like how you like to eat out ‘far away’ from home, you’re right, when it’s so close it somewhat diminishes the whole ‘eating out’ aspect of it. I especially liked your conclusion that differences bring people closer too. I was listening to this podcast about the casual sex culture among youth, and in it the speaker told of a young man who frequented dating apps in order to find himself a suitable partner. According to the young man, his perfect partner had to adhere to specific interests and hobbies. Once the man went on a date with this girl who he said was 99% perfect, matching all his ‘requirements’ save for one thing; she supported the Manchester United football team, while he supported their opposers. W


    • When the researcher pointed out that sometimes differing opinions can bring people together, the young man didn’t seem to understand! But it truly highlights the fact that in our desire to find things in common with other people, quite often our differences are what bring us closer!


  2. This one made me chuckle. I like pinto beans cooked the way my grandmother made them, but I am otherwise a lot like you and don’t care for beans much. I particularly don’t care for black beans, which I realize makes me a pariah in this day and age. Oh well. 🙂


  3. I had the worst food poisoning when I ordered steak salad. I concluded that the salad was prepared on a board with raw meat juices. The same thing happened to my husband last week (different restaurant) after he ate deep fried chicken with coleslaw. They warned his group that they had had refrigeration problems and were only serving deep fried foods. I guess they forgot that the coleslaw isn’t ‘deep fried’.


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