There’s always that family member who takes the holidays a little too far. You know who I mean  The one who disappears midway through dessert only to be found later curled up in the guest bathroom, cuddling a hand towel like it’s a long-lost lover. Well, this year, that relative turned out to be a raccoon.

Yes, a raccoon in Virginia broke into a liquor store right after Thanksgiving, helped himself to the good stuff, and then passed out in the store bathroom like a woodland frat boy who just discovered tequila. And because we humans are exactly who we are (i.e. agents of chaos with camera phones) his photo, sprawled out like a tiny masked outlaw who hit rock bottom, instantly went viral.

I mean, how rude is that?! The poor guy was clearly going through something! But of course, the internet had zero chill. Suddenly this raccoon is the poster child for “I can’t even,” and honestly, we need to give him some grace. The holidays are hard.

Let’s be real. The raccoon was probably escaping his own Thanksgiving drama. Maybe his cousin raccoon brought her new boyfriend who thinks he’s an influencer. Maybe his uncle kept asking when he was going to “settle down and stop raiding trash cans.” Maybe the whole forest family wanted to discuss politics again.

So he did what any exhausted, post-holiday mammal might do. He broke into the nearest liquor store and said, “Not today, woodland drama. Not today.”

Was it the best decision? No.
Was it relatable? Oh, absolutely yes.

Here’s hoping our furry hungover friend learned his lesson:

1. Don’t binge drink.
2. Don’t break and enter.
3. If you MUST do both, don’t pass out where humans with iPhones can find you.

But something tells me he’ll be back next year, ready to make a run for the bourbon aisle again. And maybe with a cuter, more evolved nose. If so, let’s leave him some mocktails ready at hand.