We all remember Maslow and his now-famous hierarchy of needs. Good ol’ Abe gave us that trusty triangle, reminding us that before we can become our fullest, most radiant selves, we must first be fed, housed, and secure enough to exhale. Fair enough, Maslow. Hard to chase your dreams when you’re chasing down rent.

But once those basics are handled, what then?

Self-actualization, he says. Becoming everything we’re capable of being. Sounds lofty. Sounds philosophical. Sounds… like a lot.

But here’s the thing: the path to self-actualization isn’t paved with marble columns and TED Talks. It’s often marked by the little things. The strange, sacred pebbles of everyday delight.

Like a good belly laugh. The kind that sneaks up on you, takes over your lungs, and leaves you questioning whether you should’ve done more ab exercises in your youth. I like to say: a good laugh a day keeps the doctor away. Although let’s be clear, see your doctor once a year, folks. Preventive health is its own kind of liberation. As someone in healthcare, I had to plug that in.

Then, there’s bread pudding. The soft, sweet reminder that dessert is a form of love language. Especially if it’s served warm and made by someone who gets you.

There’s the annual trip not for the insta but for the wide-eyed curiosity it sparks. To walk foreign streets, try mysterious dishes, and momentarily forget where you put your inbox. That’s not just travel. That’s soul fuel.

Then there’s the refuge of home. Not just a shelter, but a sacred space where you can cook something indulgent, wear mismatched socks, and disappear into your own hum. Where the noise of the world quiets just enough for your thoughts to stretch out and nap.

And of course, there are the pets. The fluffy, barky, unconditional love-givers who never judge your existential spirals or your fourth rerun of Murder, She Wrote. They just want to sit near your feet while you ponder your life’s purpose or reheat leftovers. That’s grace.

Let’s not forget the fabulous extras: a few good pairs of high heels that make you strut like you own the sidewalk (because you do), and clutches that whisper glamour even when you’re just grabbing a slice of pizza. Style, after all, is part of the psyche.

And beyond all that? We need our people. The ones who love us loudly and silently. Who cheer us on when we’re brave and hold us when we’re broken. Who remind us we’re not alone in our climb up that Maslowian pyramid.

So yes, self-actualization is a noble goal, but it’s not just achieved through journaling or meditating on mountaintops. It’s built day by day with ordinary magic: a laugh, a meal, a moment of peace, a fabulous shoe.

A good life is cobbled together with small joys, sturdy support, and the freedom to be unapologetically you.

Here’s to that and to bread pudding as a spiritual experience.