After years of commuting through the urban jungle, I’ve come to a startling conclusion: we should subsidize earphones for everyone, especially those crammed into crowded trains. Picture this: it’s 7:30 a.m., and you’re wedged between a chatty Cathy on her morning call and a big, burly 20-something guy jamming to “Johnny B. Goode.” Now, I’m all for classic rock, but at that hour, I’m more of a “silence is golden” type.

It’s quite a scene these days. As a veteran commuter, I’ve been subjected to every kind of auditory assault imaginable. From heated political debates to impromptu karaoke sessions, the variety is endless. But here’s a wild thought: what if we saved our collective sanity by ensuring everyone had a pair of earphones?

Imagine the tranquility. Instead of enduring unsolicited updates on Brenda’s love life or someone’s questionable taste in dubstep, we could all cocoon ourselves in our personal soundscapes. It’s not just about preserving our eardrums; it’s about mental peace. Subsidized earphones could be the ultimate commuter bliss.

Alternatively, we could lobby for commuter etiquette classes. A mandatory course where we teach people the art of volume control and the beauty of silent appreciation. Picture this: a utopian world where everyone understands the social contract of shared spaces. No more unfiltered conversations, no more loud music. Just a harmonious blend of silent, respectful commuters.

Back to our friend with the Johnny B. Goode obsession. Maybe he watched “Back to the Future” one too many times, or perhaps he just loves a good guitar riff. Either way, I’d rather not be part of his personal soundtrack. So, let’s rally for earphone subsidies or an etiquette revolution. Our minds and ears will thank us.