The sadness in helping my son get the suit

The past month has been leading up to this week and one day in particular. The memorial services are this week. So much preparation goes into putting on a celebration of life that you become numb to a lot of things throughout the days. And, most people won’t understand even if they are trying to be helpful or just there for you. It’s a lonely endeavor.

Today, I had to sadly bite the bullet and do some final prep work that is not mind-numbing. These bits are more emotional.

Today, I helped my 14 year old son pick out the suit for his father’s memorial service. First off, he hates trying on clothes. Second, we finally went into my spouse’s closet. And, there were his suits. I slowly unzipped the suit bags and pulled a few out. Luckily, the second one fit my son. He fit into his dad’s suit.

It is a momentous occasion at any time. But, today, it was riddled with sadness. They say with time, pain eases. I know it does. I’ve been through grief before. But seeing my son wear that suit was heartbreaking. We both stood quiet and noted that suit was the one. I then quietly packed it up with the memory book.

9 replies »

  1. SMiLes Giving A Euology

    At mY Father’s Funeral Dear

    Miriam my Uncle Complained

    That i Was Wearing Shorts and A


    Some How

    my Father Put
    Away His Suit
    After He Retired too

    If Only We Could Have
    Found What Lives Underneath
    my Father’s SKin Oh to Know And
    Feel and Sense A Loved One Enough to

    Miss Them
    With A Tear…

    There Are Losses

    That Never Even Begin

    And There Are Loves

    Where the Suit

    of Soul Alway Lives…

    True It’s Life It’s Warm

    It’s Cold It’s Colorful And Stale

    And Some Days You Just Wanna Get Through…

    And Some



    Wanna Leave
    Eternally New Now…

    Wishing You A Great
    Journey on the Other Side of the Moon..:)


  2. As you complete each of these steps, you are teaching your son how to handle the losses he will face. Even more than most kids, because this was of the biggest blows a child will receive.

    He sees you being strong – somewhere deep inside he also knows you are doing it for him, too. Even if he doesn’t understand it all now, he will remember, and know how it should feel.

    It is still heartbreaking – how could it not be? With you in spirit.


  3. Sitting here, with tears in my eyes for your words, knowing how it feels, when dad passed away in 2021 and I’m old, but it hurts so much…….I wish you so much strength for this difficult hard day ❤


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