“Mother’s love is peace. It need not be acquired, it need not be deserved.” Fromm

The month of May is my month. Or so, I like to proclaim. First my birthday. Then mother’s day. Then just random celebrations of being. Springtime is fully in force and the world is blooming. Of course, with that comes horrific allergies and sneezing attacks but we’ll leave that topic alone.

I love motherhood. Love my son and am proud to be his mom. Mother’s day means a lot to me in that respect. I also loved my mom greatly and still mourn her passing. It’s a day where in Puerto Rican culture I would wear a white carnation.

My mother passed away a decade ago. She died relatively young for an older person. Does that make sense? And, this past year on my birthday I experienced the oddest sensation and occurrence.

I received the usual texts, videos, facebook birthday wishes. Which are always nice to receive. Yet, all day, I kept feeling as if something was missing. I kept checking my phone as if expecting a call. Then, I realized that I had been waiting for my mom’s phone call.

Every year she would call and sing some wacky birthday song to me. I haven’t had that in ten years. I subconsciously waited, although I knew better. I am not too sure why but this year, I really missed hearing her voice on my birthday.

Today, I wish I could call her and say Happy Mother’s Day. At least my son gave me a peanut butter filled Mother’s day embrace. And, for that I am grateful.