Need to get my life together

I love putting to-do lists together. I thrive om them. I get a jolt of energy from them. Yes, admittedly that is a bit odd. But I love seeing things I need to get done and putting a path together moving forward. I love seeing the checkmarks next to items. I’ve been putting these lists together for years.

However, the last few months or so my list-making has been sporadic. Before today, my last list was maybe two weeks ago. I’m looking at my blank yellow pad wondering what has happened. I love my lists but I have not shown them any love as of late. As I look at my blank pad, I’m wondering if I have moved on from my lists. If so, what happened?

I don’t believe I have moved on. I love my lists and the love will be rekindled. Maybe even today. I just had reached a point for a few months where I couldn’t think too forward and just was caught up in each moment. Now, on one hand, some might argue that can be a good thing. I’m living in the moment. Or, others might argue, it could be that there’s just too much in the moment that it doesn’t leave room for more.

But as I look at my hot pink notebook I crave writing exciting things in it. I don’t know if I want to fill it with tasks but instead I might want to fill it with aspirational writings and thoughts, as well as recaps of exciting adventures. Yes, that is where I need to be. It’s amazing how a routine task can take on such loaded meaning. But we all have those routine items that move us forward or pull us back. We just need to listen to what they are telling us in our day-to-day lives. My to-do lists help me take stock of my life. When I forgoed my list, I was flying blind. It’s time to sit down, coffee in hand and Netflix in the background, and write out a lengthy list.

21 replies »

  1. After 33 years of Work
    My Boss said You Are A
    Great List Maker And
    Valuable Commodity
    Shortly After i
    Got Sick and Tired
    Of Being Just A ‘Sex
    Object’ they still pay
    Me to Write ‘Bibles’
    For Free still making
    Lists too ‘FB Profile
    Pic Bible Vol 2019”
    2 Year Anniversary
    Of 2.62 Million
    Words in the
    Description areas
    Of the Profile Pics
    i did it in
    Of my
    Only Son who
    Lived 51 Days
    And to Forget about
    Working For the Government as this week
    i am Celebrating “7 Million WordS Old “Song of
    My SoUL” in 70 Months
    Of Effort for the longest
    Epic Long Form Poem
    Bible in The History
    Of Humankind
    Along with
    11,366 Miles
    Of Public Dance
    In 70 Months Starting
    All starting at age 53
    After recovering from
    66 Months of Sick Hell
    For Being A Government
    ‘Sex Object’ for Pay
    Worker but only
    Crazy People
    Do what i do now
    Just imagine what i
    Could have Done
    If Culture didn’t
    Turn me into
    A List Maker
    And made me
    A Dancer And Singer
    And Supported my
    Creativity instead of
    Destroying it every
    Day oh well another
    Day Another Bible
    Poem Another Free
    Verse Dance too
    Now i Give my
    Pimps more than
    One Finger yes all
    10 Fingers All
    10 Toes up up and
    Always Away no Angry
    Bird Just Spiraling
    Around the Cuckoo’s
    Nest with Crazy
    Free Bird
    Wings hehe
    F yes
    The ‘Sex
    Object’ to
    Do lists this
    One is for my only
    Son Ryan his
    Birthday 2 Days
    Before mine on
    June 4th he passed
    Away in ‘97.. i Don’t
    Forget a Promise
    i told him his 51
    Day Life would
    Inspire me to
    Do what no
    Other Human
    Has Ever Done Before
    But it Took me 10 Years
    To Escape ‘Sex Object’
    And 66 Months
    After that
    To Escape Hell
    In the Dead Zone
    Anyway i
    Did it
    For my
    Only Son and
    For my
    Life too
    There will
    Be no need for
    Me to cone back…
    Bible Writers always
    The Verses
    Are only
    By Word Count
    And the Dance by
    Video Voyeurs
    Grand Children
    The Years of
    The Village Holy
    Fool While i Carry
    A Jack Nicholson
    Grin that yes
    Me and
    Flew over
    The Cuckoo’s
    Nest the Joke
    NoW is on ‘them’
    May your Son Enjoy
    Life more than me
    Or at Least as
    Much my
    Sunday Prayer
    For the Children
    As i Bless the Beasts
    Too and the Rest of
    Nature as Living Real
    God for now
    As Any Holy
    Village Fool
    Will Do hehe
    On the WordPress
    Global Reader Trail
    Hehe have a Nice Day..
    Hope you enjoyed
    It Doing
    It Now List..
    Comes Before A Son..:)


  2. Lists mean I’m organized, but they are to handle the stuff I hate doing.

    I’ve been living from day to day for so long that the few list-writing efforts have been ignored within days – I can’t do better yet, so lists are pointless.

    Maybe you’re just experiencing the sinking feeling that comes from ignoring your lists, and your mind doesn’t want to make more, just to have them be ignore.

    My guess: it will come back. When? No clue.

    Relax. This is Life. You don’t get graded – not here, anyway.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Aside from times when I’ve gone on ‘list breaks’ I’ve always kept lists of varying types. Short-term, long-term, you name it. Learned from nurse colleagues to put a little box next to each item, and it’s so gratifying to check each one off as I complete it. Less gratifying are the items that keep coming up…


  4. My list are my thoughts..ugh..sometimes their not good hahahaha. Sending good vibs!! Great list! Keep on keeping on! Im new here! Just getting started..thanks!


  5. Perhaps in lieu of making a “to do” list, you should make a “have done” at the end of the day. Then you can still feel the sense of accomplishment. And,.. you still get to make a list.


  6. While I’m not so much of a list writer, I can see how it would be useful for some people. And I got to admit there’s times where I forget things because I was too careless to write down my thoughts. Hope you had a productive time writing your most recent list.


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