As a little girl, I don’t believe I had many shoes. We were poor. We had what we needed. But shoes were important to my life. I remember really wanting a pair of high top converse sneakers. I dreamt if having it. I dreamt of walking to school in them. My mom got them for me to my utter delight. I didn’t question how she got them. To this day i don’t remember what happened to that pair of shoes I had so desired.
Fast forward a fear years (ahem), and I have shoes at work, in storage and in three rooms at home. I just recently wore a pair of pink shoes I got in London a decade ago. I wear all my shoes and keep them in good condition. Some shoes I completely wear down till they are ripped are the soles fall off. Sometimes at work I change shoes two or three times.
I think I can honestly say I love shoes. Probably just like a good 50% of the women in the US. I made up that percentage but it seems right to me. Once I started making a decent salary, I bought shoes for my mom. We were the same size for a good chunk of time. It gave me pleasure to buy her shoes. I felt good and sad at times. But I will stick with the happy feeling here.
Despite my love of shoes, I have not bought a pair in over 6 months. Have I been replaced by a pod person? I am quite worried by this turn of events. You know why? It means that I have been too busy with work, house hunting and other crazy possibly tedious things. I haven’t made time to shop. I haven’t found time to shop for shoes. I must be feverish.
This past week, a very well meaning older gentleman warned me to find time to care for myself. Work will be work. Unreasonable expectations by others will always exist and we can’t go crazy and tired trying to meet those types of expectations. He mentioned to me how he once went to a job interview where four of the interviewers had oxygen tanks. He said thanks but no thanks. Those were board members can you imagine what the job did to the actual employees? No thanks.
For me, my indicator is my shoe buying behavior. I love shoes. I love shopping for them. It’s one of the few things I don’t really buy on Amazon. If I can’t find time for such a simple pleasure, what will happen to me?