I was just in the shower when I was humming The Cure’s most horrific, banal song “It’s Friday I’m in love.” How did the Cure go from goth to sap? Mind boggling. Anyway, once I noticed I was humming that I tried to change my ear worm. Then I sadly said to myself “It’s Friday, sometimes you just have to let it go.”
Indeed, this has been a week where I experienced a dull high from a major accomplishment that I could not shed tears of joy over since I was too steeped in crap. Yes, I said it. And so have others. My career coach of sorts noted that I had about 4 jobs at the moment, one of which is family, and that I just had to let something go. He wasn’t the only one to have said that in the span of 24 hours.
I have tried to make my usual to-do lists that motivate me. Yet, I have found I can’t get myself to write anything. I have achieved a state of being where I have writer’s block as far as my to-do list is concerned. What gives? I have reached a point where I have to step back and say “no” but for a superwoman like me that is a hard endeavor. I know I can’t do everything but I also know that I can do much.
So here I am singing “let it go” a song my son absolutely hates and that I find just as annoying. But the phrase “let it go” keeps running in my head. And just like that I just started humming an ’80s song by the band Information Technology. My mind is racing. I most assuredly need a couch-vegging session where no one talks to me.
What I have also come to terms with is that I need not necessarily let something go. At times I can “kick the can” forward so that at some point someone else takes up the action. I don’t need to keep proving myself in terms of what I can do. Others can also take up the slack. Yes. Kicking the can may be the wisest choice at times. I do not need to do it alk or discard the bits I cannot do. I can leave things undone for others to do. I do not always have to be the nice one that fixes everything beforehand for others; leaving me tired, sick and downtrodden.
I give myself permission to not only say “no” but to also say “hey, how about you do it?”