childhood

It’s 2:14 am and I’m searching for a Secret: Perhaps I watch too much TV

It’s 2:14 am and I’m searching for a Secret: Perhaps I watch too much TV

2:14 am. That was the time at which I awoke startled. Had I been dreaming or as someone really calling out my name? My heartbeat was rapid and I was disoriented. I looked around. There was no one shaking me. There was, as far as I could see, no one calling out to me. I listened intently to the house rhythms. The air conditioner hummed and drummed in a soothing manner. I anxiously looked towards the closet afraid of what I would see. Luckily there were no evil bright eyes peering out at me. There was no rabid wolf about to pounce out. I took a deep breath like I have learned to do from my Pilates videos. It was ok. It was going to be ok.

Growing up my mother had always warned me about being called out by name in dreams. We were to never turnaround when being called. If we heard our actual name it was a bad sign that some evil spirit was lurking about. If it was a known individual calling out one’s name that was even more ominous in that they may be in danger. The spirits were trying to warn us. However, if we heeded such warning in our dreams and looked back we ourselves in peril. I truly do not know how I managed to sleep at night with all of my mother’s warnings. I do know that as a result if said warnings my dreams were and continue to be quite vivid and intricate.

I managed to fall back asleep at around 2:25am or so. I fell into a deep sleep and maze of dreams where I was searching for a secret. I opened box upon box in hopes of finding that secret. The boxes were ivory-colored and assembled as if they were in a bank vault. However, it was underground. The boxes appeared to be made of bones. I didn’t stop to think or wonder about where the bones came from. I was deep in the search for the secret. It was consuming and stomach-gnawing. I could feel the secret travel through my veins. It wanted to burst out. I searched and searched. Boxes were opened and peered into. There was nothing but vast emptiness. My eyes were wide opened and my hands outstretched. I was ready and anxious to fulfill my duty to find the secret. Yet it was sneaky and a step ahead of me.

I felt a hand on my shoulder. Was it there to guide me and steer me in the right direction? “Mom, are you awake?” “Mom, are you awake?” “Mom, it’s morning!”

Indeed. I awoke from my slumber perplexed. It was 5:40am. It was morning and time for the morning chores and the daily grind. I made my strong cafe con leche (coffee with milk). As I quickly ingested my coffee in order to get my caffeine boost, I could not shake off my dream. I was born close to 2:00am. My son was born shortly after 2:00pm. Obviously, my search through box upon box echoes my real-life search for something more. Perhaps, I’m waiting for that final push to get me to that next stage. Opening the boxes in my dream indicates my willingness to venture forth. However, the fact that I did not find what I was looking for in those opened boxes serves as a warning that things may take time. While they may take time, I must open those boxes and be prepared for minor setbacks. However, the love of my son and family will keep me steady. That’s what I take from this dream. Of course, there is also the secret component to my dreams which indicates I need to weed out those that I feel are being untruthful or misguiding. I have lots to process, as my mom would have noted.

However, it really could be that I have watched Game of Thrones, Indiana Jones Temple of Doom or Pretty Little Liars (my guilty pleasure) way too many times. Could be that I just don’t believe that “A” is truly gone. Oh, TV!- how you toy with me and my sleep!

 

 

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10 replies »

  1. Despite the suggestion in my own daily prompt response that I’ll publish momentarily, I believe that dreams are more than just a reflection of our worries and fears from our lives. I think they can be windows to a past life, or messages from spirit. Who knows really. But I liked your post!

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      • In my post response, I shied away from all that, though. I didn’t provide a concrete analysis of my dream but I suggested that my dream was a reflection of real life insecurities about my feet. I guess I’m a little too nervous to put it out there that I sometimes wonder if I had a past life in the 1940s. Many of my dreams take place that decade. Weird.

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  2. Dreams. Scary, mysterious. Being chased. Screaming. Feet flying. Arms flailing. These were my dreams, many times. But, I never had one that I was searching for a secret in boxes. Different. So glad you had your family there in the morning. Dreams could be so disturbing, for sure. My dreams were always interrupted by my husband. I woke him up with my screaming, and my feet kicking, and he gently nudged me awake.

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  3. WTF I thought to myself it just wouldn’t stop, I asked my family stop it, stop playing around and they kept telling me that I was losing it. After time and after my both lungs partially collapsed, 7 bulging disc in my back, bleeding in the back of my eyes, both of my arms ripped tendons, both arms torn, diverticulitis, loss of vision in my right eye and I could go on and on and on.
    What is going on, alright enough is enough there had to be a different answer, so I started thinking differently.
    I was being attacked and beaten paranormal or what!, now I had to listen they were trying to get my attention and they have it now!
    If I don’t help them crossover I get pushed to the ground like last month they pushed me to the floor and I broke my foot. My Doctor didn’t even give me a Cast he lied and said that I didn’t want it what a bunch of crap he gave me, why the hell would I deny a cast, going on I now pay attention to them all they want is someone to hear their story and then after that they want me to help them go back home, some of them don’t even know that they have passed. So Hey, I believe now.
    Funny thing is I had dreams about before I was born.
    Ezme

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