Humans like to think of the bathroom as their private space. But if you live with dogs, you know that “private” is a myth. The bathroom is not yours alone. It’s a stage where your furry companions reveal their quirks, philosophies, and, oddly enough, life lessons.

Take my big dog, for instance. He treats the bathroom like his personal spa retreat. Cool tile floor? Yes, please. Thunderstorm outside? The bathtub is now a bunker. He has discovered what many mindfulness gurus charge hundreds of dollars to teach: sometimes you just need a quiet, tiled sanctuary where no one can bother you. Unless, of course, I walk in. Then suddenly it’s not his sanctuary anymore. He’ll look at me like, Excuse me, I was here first, and saunter out in protest. The lesson here? Even in a house full of love, everyone deserves their own space. Until mom ruins it.

The little one, my ten-pound shadow, has developed a more nuanced philosophy. He will happily join me for a bath, lounging nearby like he’s supervising a spa day. But a shower? Absolutely not. He draws a line. Maybe he fears I’ll scoop him up and subject him to the deluge. Or maybe he’s just a bath elitist. Steam, candles, bubbles, yes; pounding showerhead, no. His lesson? Boundaries matter. Even in devotion, you’re allowed to say, “I’ll be there for this but not that.”

And then there’s my middle dog, the curmudgeon. He doesn’t follow me in. Doesn’t hang out. Doesn’t care if I’m in there reading shampoo bottles or contemplating life choices. Unless, he’s hungry. Then, suddenly, the bathroom door is his podium, and he’s delivering a full-throated demand for food. He doesn’t care what I’m doing; he wants dinner, and he wants it now. The life lesson here? Priorities. Stick to them. Hunger waits for no one, not even someone mid-bath.

So, from the bathroom chronicles of my three dogs, I’ve learned:

1. Find your refuge, even if it’s a weird one.
2.  Know your boundaries, and don’t be afraid to enforce them.
3. And when it’s mealtime, for heaven’s sake, stop philosophizing and just get fed.

Private space? Not with dogs. But wisdom? They’ve got it covered.