childhood

And, of course it’s raining: I was meant to only be happy when it rains on my birthday

At around 3am this morning several rounds of thunder broke through my dream state. It was heavy and ominous sounding. I can’t remember whether I was having a good dream or not. What I did realize was that of course there was thunder. It was officially my birthday. And, you know what? It always rains on my birthday. Even in drought-ravaged Los Angeles. It is just my destiny on life to have a rain-soaked birthday.

From an early age, I learned to always carry an umbrella. I learned all the chants to wish the rain away. But here’s the thing. Sure, I don’t like getting all dolled up, blowing out my hair, to only have mother nature frizz it all out. I’m not happy with that. However, I do love jumping in puddles and singing in the rain. If you have never gone puddle jumping, I highly recommend it. Because of all the thunderstorms I’ve experienced weather-wise in my life on my birthday, I’ve always been prepared for the worst. Yet, I still sing in the rain. I was meant to be a sunny curmudgeon. And, those who don’t get that duality of my personality, will miss out on a good fun and dark ride.

I was recently watching many television shows which pay homage to late ’80s or early ’90s songs. And, I was reminded of the song by Garbage called I’m only happen when it rains. It could be construed as depressing but it’s actually a tongue-in-cheek lyrics parodying the typically angst-filled themes of mid-nineties alternative rock. Now, that is so me.

So, the rain fits me. I just need a better rain coat. And, perhaps some sun breakthroughs. Just to round it all out.

6 replies »

  1. “I’m Only Happy When it Rains,”
    Of Course The First Song That Came
    to Mind/Soul For me and Dance is “Singing in the
    Rain” By Gene Kelly Now True i Understand How
    That Old ‘Garbage’ Song Feels Like too Even When it is
    Not Just A Parody of the Grunge Songs of the 90’s Such
    As “Black Hole Sun Won’t You Come And Wash Away the Rain”
    by Stone
    Temple
    Pilots of Course
    Yet These Days We
    Have The ‘Trump Meme’
    For Years to Replace That
    And the Reality of the 24/7 News
    Shows That Relate the Destruction And the
    (The Addiction to Adrenalin And Dopamine that
    Fear, Anger, And Hate Brings is Still Very Real Now
    And Practically An Online Pandemic of Human Soul too)
    Blood and Gore of War For All to See in ‘Real Time Now’…
    The Human Mind Indeed is a Fascinating Creation of Nature
    And An Even More Fascinating Imaginer And Creator Now True
    As THere is No Measure of Limits For What iMaGiNaTioN And CREaTiViTY
    of the Human Mind May BRinG NoW And Be Even Beyond Mathematical Old
    Measures Like
    iNFiNITY That Still
    BeLieVE iN Human
    Created iLLuSioNS of
    TiME, Distance, Space and
    Matter Yet Again We Humans
    Are Imaginers and Creators This
    Way Who May Often Dream up the Strangest
    of Nightmares and Dreams Come True of CuLTuRE
    in Fruition
    Both in
    Group
    And
    Even
    More Solo Ways Now…
    I’ve Lived in the Same Place
    For Almost 29 Years Now; There Were
    Years i never noticed the Flowers; There Were
    Years When Every Cloud Made me Feel Dark Within
    And There Was Never Ending Days Where All i Felt like is
    A Rain Drop Hitting the Roof, Nothing More Or Less For Real then…
    Yet You See No One Ever Told me That i Was/Am Actually ‘A Human Star’ With The Potential
    Real Relative Free Will Through An Autotelic Flow Now Of Meditative Dance And Song Free
    For the Bio-Feedback to Generate All My Own Happy Neurohormones and Neurochemicals
    (Sunshine, Rainbows,
    And Oh My God So
    Much More For REaL)
    Too As Where i Am
    From in the United
    States The Goals and The
    Aims Were Most always External
    Spoon-Fed From Birth With a Natural
    Self-Fulfilling Prophecy of What Can And Will
    Be a Culture of the Greatest Poverty of Not Understanding
    One’s Own Self in Finding Intrinsic Manuals WHere No one owns
    or controls our Potential for Happiness Except For Us When Indeed
    Every Inhale of Peace Exhale of Love is A New Birthday Breath now…
    Obviously, if i Worked
    in the Same Hell
    Hole i Used to
    Work in, This Would
    Be Virtually Impossible for
    me to Do as i am Only Human
    And Really All of This is only A Gift,
    As Usual Happy
    Birthday With SMiLes…
    “i’m Singing in the Rain,
    i’m Singing in the Rain, ETc…:)

    Like

  2. Love it when it rains . . . Always did, ‘we’ as kids and still for me . . . although I don’t go running around in it these days. (BTW, same time last night, awakened by those heavy rains—hoping for more over the next few hours)

    Like

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