death

My mom died nine years ago but I thought it was just yesterday

This morning I received a Facebook messenger notification. A friend had forwarded me the Facebook notification they had received alerting them that we became friends nine years ago. Of course, we had been friends way longer than that. We have known each other since elementary school. So, it has been a while. Facebook notifications like those constantly amuse. Anyway. Despite knowing each other for such a long while, we had lost touch with one another for a decade or two. Really lost touch. And, I was indeed so happy to have reconnected this day nine years ago. But I was extremely sad to receive this notification.

I never posted on Facebook when my mother died. I didn’t want to share that with the world of Facebook friends. Despite all my writings, I am a bit private. Go figure. Yet, when I received this forward from my friend, it served as notification of my mom’s death. She didn’t die this day. But she had her massive stroke from which she never recovered.

The day my long-lost friend came back into my life, my mother’s transition began. The universe works in mysterious, complicated ways. Despite my sadness, I was taken back by something else. Whenever I am discussing my mother’s passing with others, I note two things: how young she was (for these times) and how recent it was. The pain is still raw so it seems like yesterday. Yet, it wasn’t. It was nine years ago and I cannot believe my mommy has been gone for that long from my life. Memories, love, pain can all play tricks on you. And, it hurts. And, that is ok.

24 replies »

  1. “Memories, love, pain can all play tricks on you. And, it hurts. And, that is ok.”

    Whenever i am reminded
    Of my Mother’s Last Silent
    Breath i remember
    Unconditional
    Love that Loves no
    Matter what and
    Carry on Her Legacy
    For me.. it’s not always
    Easy but it keeps her
    Alive
    In Essence..
    And me too..:)

    Liked by 2 people

  2. My mom died in December of 1983. She was just 60 years old. It’s been a long time by any standard and I still miss her. Sometimes I cry. Sometimes I dream of her as if she were still alive. I think it’s something that we never really “get over.”

    Like

  3. My father died in 1989 at the age of 42. Not a
    day goes by that I don’t think about him and miss him terribly. We never get over the loss of our loved ones, we just learned to live around the gaping hole in our hearts and lives. I’m so sorry about your mom.

    Like

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