new york

Walking by past my door

Several years back a work colleague displayed what, at the time, I considered to be a slightly odd quirk. I didn’t think too much of it but it had made me think the person was overly cautious. Having grown up in New York I understood on a DNA level being cautious for I had seen many questionable behaviors. And, as a result I always scan a block ahead when walking to determine if there are any upcoming dangerous situations. It’s a quite useful New York tactic in that it can readily keep you out of trouble. Many New Yorkers are natural born scanners. Even with such a skillset in my background, I am not that cautious in a hotel-a place filled with strangers. Go figure.

This weekend I was on business travel and it was easy for everyone on the team to see which room was mine. I didn’t think twice, or at all about it. Everyone could see me go into my room. And, at one point I audibly chuckled to myself when I thought of both my work colleague and my new apartment building.

Let me explain.

On a business trip years back, I came to learn that my business colleague would readily walk past her hotel door. She often didn’t go straight to her room. I came to find this out when we arrived to our hotel floor together and she pretended her room wasn’t her room. There had been others behind us and she wanted to make sure they wouldn’t know to which room she was going. It was her tactic for being safe. I found it quirky and then didn’t think much of it.

Fast forward to two weeks ago, where upon exiting my apartment building elevator, I immediately (without thinking about it) readily walked past my door. See, my apartment door is right in front of the elevator. There was someone who remained in the elevator and I didn’t want them to see me go straight into that apartment. I felt odd opening my apartment door in front of them. Thus, I walked till the end of the hallway and waited until I heard the elevator doors close. Then I ran back to my door while I laughed at myself. It had taken me a while, but I finally understood my colleague’s quirkiness. Her particular constant concern. It made sense. Now, if only I were a CIA officer.

Categories: new york, Psychology, society, Travel

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7 replies »

  1. 2AM never fearing Walking Blocks away
    From Dance Hall Bar…
    Cosmic Sound in
    Shot Gun
    Blast Waking
    Dead in Lord’s
    Prayer true
    When a
    Sneezes a
    Katy Perry
    Eye of the
    As Thugs
    Spread out
    Of Roach Motels…
    Hehe.. trust me
    Never Heard
    A Sneeze Louder…
    HAha Heart Attack
    Material For Sun Day School and Thug Beats..
    Bigger Teeth in the
    Dentist Sizing
    Chart Too With
    ‘Hulk’ Grin…
    Bigger Teeth…
    Male privilege….
    Didn’t have it
    for Decades until
    Lion Sneeze..;)


  2. Women routinely add safety measures to their lives, small things which don’t make sense to some other people, including most men. But you felt uneasy, even by the tiniest amount, and did the right thing. NY is not a ‘safe place’ – but you can make it safer by being aware of your surroundings.


  3. It like getting out of the car and clutching the car keys between my fingers . Just in case. Just in case I need to rip them down someones face if they come after me! It’s a woman thing!


  4. This is scary. I do this thing constantly (disguising my true destination), but I live outside the US. I am not happy to think the “homeland” is this unsafe and requires such diligence.


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