Learning to let go even if they will fail


As a kid you have to learn to walk and to eat and to well, everything.  As we learn our parents can only do so much for us to hold us up. They have to, despite their instincts, let us occasionally fall.


As a boss, one of the hardest things I have ever had to do was to let staff fail. I tried to pass that lesson on to all my team members wherever I have been because it is an invaluable one.   People learn from mistakes. Or so you hope they do.  If they repeatedly make the same mistake then there is a different issue at hand that you have to address. Mistakes are, however, one of the greatest teachers.


Now as adults we also have to learn to let other people besides our kids and staff members fail. And it is never easy. There have been so many times these past few months where my belief in letting people occasionally fail has been tested.  I don’t want to see people suffer through new life tasks. But I also know that I cannot hand hold. I also know that I cannot help those that do not want to be helped.  We can try so hard to get someone through the finish line but they have to first want to get into the race.


Thus this past week I texted a friend letting her know that I am just letting certain things go and just psychologically moving on.   It has been difficult letting go in that I have to remind myself at each step of the way that I mean to step back.   But I get roped into the drama and there has been too much drama and I need to cut the rope short. If that makes sense.


It pains me to let go but I will be here when that person is ready.



5 replies »

  1. I had to walk away from a friendship several years ago. It was very hurtful and I had to work through some forgiveness issues. I handed it off to God to show me how to forgive. It took 3 years, but He moved my heart. Much later, I met her for coffee, stated my case, told her I forgave her and let it go. I can “love” her in Christ now, not close to me, but in peace for us both. I pray that you can get to that spot as well. It may not be the exact situation as yours, but I strongly believe sometimes we do need to release certain friendships and if we allow, we will be given discernment and understanding in time post the process. Then the hurt and or disappointment will abate. Liked the post, as always.


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