I love the holidays. I love this season.

I love the lights, the warmth, the collective permission to be softer and louder at the same time. I love joy. I love giving. I love finding the gift. The one that says “I see you” without requiring a long speech.

Gift giving is my love language.
Which means that this is my season. I am in my element. I am at full wattage. I am basically an elf with opinions.

And with that comes questions. Seasonal questions. Etiquette questions. Things that suddenly feel loaded.

For example.

Is it rude to salt someone’s food when you’re a guest?

I read this headline last night and immediately thought, wow, we are really out here policing sodium now.

I say that No. Not rude.

If someone comments on how delicious the food is and then adds salt, that feels honest, not insulting. Some people have a sweet tooth. Some people have a salt tooth. This is not a character flaw. This is physiology.

It’s the culinary version of “It’s not you, it’s me.”

Also, let’s be real, wouldn’t it be worse to quietly not salt the food and then not fully enjoy the meal? I would much rather someone season their plate and be happy than eat politely and leave unsatisfied.

Season your food. Compliment the cook. Everyone wins.

Now, is it rude not to open gifts in front of the giver?

Ah. This one is trickier.

I love opening gifts on Christmas Day. There is something sacred about that timing. The pacing. The anticipation. The ritual.

I don’t love feeling rushed into a performative unwrapping because someone wants the immediate reaction. I understand the desire. I really do. But for me, the joy is mixed up with the day itself.

So where do I land?

I think it’s okay to say “I love this so much and I can’t wait to open it on Christmas.”

And also okay to compromise if someone is really insistent. I’ll open a few. I’ll smile. I’ll emote appropriately. I’ll keep the rest for the moment that feels right.

Joy doesn’t have to be on demand.

Here’s another, is it rude to give a gift without a card?

I try very hard to always include a card. Cards matter to me. They explain the gift. They hold the sentiment. They become mementos tucked into drawers and boxes long after the ribbon is gone.

Occasionally, yes, I miss one. Life happens. But ideally? A gift should come with words.

Because the gift says I thought of you. The card says why.

And both matter.

So what’s my takeaway here?

The holidays are about joy, warmth, generosity and also grace. Grace for different tastes. Different traditions. Different timing.

Salt the food. Open gifts when it feels meaningful. Write the card when you can. Forgive the moments when you can’t.

We’re all just trying to love each other well. Sometimes with wrapping paper, sometimes with seasoning, sometimes with a simple fa la la and good intentions.

And honestly?

If you’re showing up with care, thoughtfulness, and a little sparkle, you’re doing it right.

Fa la la la la