I woke up Sunday morning to the familiar flicker-flash of my lights going out. Just boop. Total darkness. Then boop the lights came back on like nothing happened. At this point, Con Edison and I are in a toxic relationship. They gaslight me. Literally.

But instead of spiraling into rage, I found myself giggling because my brain did what it always does when chaos strikes: it pulled out a random quote from one of my all-time favorite movies, Better Off Dead.

You know the one: “Go that way very fast. If something gets in your way… turn!”

Honestly? That might as well be the horoscope for the rest of my month. Actually, my year.

Because that’s the vibe right now.
Move quickly. Don’t look back. Don’t think too much about the fact that the universe keeps hurling random objects into your path like it’s training you for some Olympic obstacle course you did NOT sign up for.

The lights go out?
Turn.

The plans fall through?
Turn.

Someone throws another project, crisis, or existential curveball your way?
Buckle up, buttercup.
Turn.

I feel like I’m in a very specific stage of adulthood where half the time I’m sprinting, the other half I’m dodging, and the rest I’m pretending the whole thing is a fun obstacle course because it’s cheaper than therapy.

There’s a finish line out there. I’m sure of it. Somewhere. Probably behind a hedge. Maybe guarded by raccoons, groundhogs, or foxes. Who knows. They all hang out in my backyard. But I’m determined to reach it, even if I have to zigzag, somersault, or hopscotch my way through the rest of 2025.

So yes, the lights went out again.
But I didn’t meltdown. I giggled.
Because honestly? If something gets in my way, I’m just gonna turn.

Very fast.