It’s the start of my long weekend, and instead of doing something wholesome like hiking or reorganizing my sock drawer (which has seen better days), I decided to do what any self-respecting overworked human does. I binge-watched my way to enlightenment.

I started off with a documentary on 80s hair metal. Or glam metal. Or whatever subgenre of Aqua Net and leather pants you prefer to call it. It was an era of big sound, big hair, and even bigger egos. The eyeliner alone could have bankrupted Maybelline. Everyone looked like they’d been electrocuted by a guitar solo, and honestly? It was fabulous. The chaos was pure, unfiltered freedom. The kind that comes from embracing excess and not caring who’s watching.

Then, in the ultimate tonal whiplash, I followed it with a documentary on Victoria Beckham. The woman who’s turned not-smiling into a lifestyle brand. Where metal was a glitter explosion of emotion, Victoria is the embodiment of precision. Every hair, every smize, every outfit meticulously curated. Watching her after an hour of Poison and Mötley Crüe felt like going from a confetti cannon to a laser pointer.

But as I sipped my coffee (in my pajamas that are far from posh but definitely comfy), it hit me: they’re not so different. The metalheads and Mrs. Beckham are both about performance and control in different costumes. The metal bands controlled chaos. Victoria controls calm. Both demanded attention and both built empires on image, makeup, and the art of being invited into new spaces that once told them “no.”

And maybe that’s what drew me in. Beneath the teased hair and the tight smile, there’s the same relentless drive. It’s about saying: I belong here and watch me prove it. Whether you’re shredding a solo in spandex or perfecting a pout in couture, it takes grit to turn yourself into a brand.

So, as my weekend of visual anthropology continues, I’ll raise my metaphorical lighter (or my remote) to the unlikely union of metal mayhem and posh restraint. Because deep down, they’re both about power and maybe a touch of eyeliner.

Now, if only I could find a documentary that merges both worlds. “Guns N’ Posh: The Rise of Controlled Chaos.” I’d totally watch that.