Growing up in the South Bronx, my favorite catholic celebration was Easter Sunday. It’s not like we would go on an Easter egg hunt through the crack houses or anything like that. I actually never participated in an Easter egg hunt until two years ago when my baby boy was two years old and couldn’t believe we got to run around picking stuff up from the ground. But I loved Easter as a little girl. I would put on my little dress and bonnet and carry a little white purse.  It was a moment of pure ecstasy. I remember just feeling such joy and had a big grin to match.

Then at Andover, Easter Sunday was a glorious time as well. See a boarding school, we had a curfew.  But on Easter Sunday that curfew was extended by an hour so that we could attend late night mass. The lush green lawns of Andover were also perfect for acting like a little kid goofing off on silly adult Easter egg hunts. Well, we were just 16 years old so we were not quite adults and thus the goofiness was truly within character and expectations.  I remember going back to the dorm after the midnight mass feeling so happy at having had wine and being able to skip across campus by the light of the midnight moon.

After my time at Andover, I experienced Easter while living in Barcelona. Wow, that was a totally different feeling. It was actually quite solemn and serene. Or at least that is how I now remember it. Back then, as a 17 year old American living abroad, I am sure I used the occasion to have a few drinks at our favorite bar near the barrio gotico. Easter actually marked the near-completion of our time abroad so that quite sobering in that we would have to return to the US where we could then attend college and be considered adults. We liked the “adult” lifestyle in Spain. We were not too sure we wanted to so readily embrace adulthood in the United States.

The years between college and having a child, I didn’t really get a chance to celebrate my favorite holiday. Ok, Halloween and Christmas are also my favorite holidays. I love Christmas because of the cookies, the family-orientation and the giving of the gifts. I love, love getting people gifts that are specific to them. I very much customize gifts-even for my staff members. I love Christmas because it is the opposite of being a Grinch or a Scrooge.  I love Halloween just because I love costumes and being silly, plus I am a sugar fiend. You that scene in John Waters’ film “Pecker” where the little girl just downs a bag full of sugar (straight sugar).  She’s got nothing on me!  Anyway, Halloween is my gummy breakfast downed with coke zero holiday!

Easter, however, was my favorite holiday in a totally different way.  I actually liked the religious celebration and all its majesty. There was something so noble seeming about it (ignoring the rolling around in dirt looking for eggs aspect).  As we celebrate Easter, we focus on the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ.  The resurrection gives one hope, makes one humble and can fill the heart with serenity. Growing up I had this fear of death as so many people in my South Bronx neighborhood died-and died young at that.  So, you can imagine that Easter was the antithesis of the day-to-day life in poverty-stricken, resource-poor neighborhoods.  Further, Easter Sunday was a holiday that my mom and I could truly enjoy together without the burden of feeling that we had to spend money we did not have. As such, it truly did bring serenity.

The last few years I have been back in the Easter state of mind with Easter egg hunts and with me making Easter baskets for my son’s classmates. Yes, I actually made Easter baskets for all his classmates.   But there still hasn’t been the pomp and circumstance of Easter until now.

Traveling to Rome during the holy week has been a bit problematic in that there have been non-stop tourists, traffic and crammed spaces.  In going to St Peter’s Basilica on Good Friday I felt like a sardine. I never knew so many people could fit into such a space. Such sardine like situations definitely did not allow for reflection in the moment or of the majesty of the place. We were ushered about as if we were cattle. However, I still managed to dip the tips of my right-hand fingers of your right into the holy water stoup and cross myself all the while hoping that my son would see and emulate me (he is still getting a C on his Pre-K report card when it comes to making the sign of the cross).  I also bought some Vatican postcards of the new Pope who still thrills me and whose Easter Sunday celebration address is something many have been looking forward to hearing.

Mass is celebrated in the morning in Saint Peter’s Square. The Pope delivers the blessing known as the “Urbi et Orbi – to the City and to the World” from the balcony on the façade of Saint Peter’s. There are beautiful Easter windows throughout the city that do not have a commercial feel to them the way the Easter bunny strewn about every supermarket in the US does. When you purchase an item-even a skulls scarf- people wish you a happy Easter.   Easter allows one the chance to see the Church, its followers and the city in action in a way that no other holiday does.

I have had the opportunity now to fully see and experience the “Triduum” (Latin for “three day period”) celebration that extends from Holy Thursday evening to Easter Sunday; seeing a city truly come alive as it gears up to observe and experience the resurrection.  Everywhere you go in Rome history calls out to you, smacks you right in the face and makes you experience it.  Easter is part of its history and there is no doubt this is a Christian city.  There is a sense of devoutness mixed with a sense of grandeur, along with shopping (Gucci stores are still open but unfortunately not a sale to be found).  This is where I was meant to be this year. I have my Easter back and hope it will continue to stay in my heart.

I wish my mom were still alive to experience this with me as it was our holiday; but hopefully my son can now have his own Easter experience that goes beyond Easter bunnies and it will become one that we can take great joy in celebrating together.