It is that time of the week again, where we look back at some of the wacky deeds, statements and events of the week. I must admit that at times it is hard to find wacky things to report on because everything seems just so off-kilter these days. People seem to increasingly feel justified in whatever action, inaction or lie they say or do. What is the repercussion, lets say for a habitual liar? I know, they get to be elected or paraded about and handed a nice salary. I’m not pointing to anyone in particular. I’m just saying, you know? Have you noticed how that last phrase is part of what people say nowadays to justify their statements? Ok. enough of that. Here are my top ten of the week. Toodles!
1. Virgin Mothers. The British Medical Journal recently published a study that found that 1% of American Mothers claim to be virgins. This group of women apparently are aware that birth control exists but they are less likely to know how it worked. They are also less likely to have been taught about sex by their parents. Is there such a thing as remedial sex ed?
2. Karma. It often makes an appearance on this weekly wacky list. Don’t believe in karma? Down in Florida, a not so lucky Keith Ray Howell unwittingly left his wallet at the scene of his latest robbery. Dude why would you even take your wallet to a place you are about to rob? Develop a protocol and procedures manual next time. Out in California, Xavier McClinton tried to throw his wife off of a bridge, but instead he fell in. Oops. Down in Texas, Larry Poulos, allegedly robbed a bank by handing a teller a note that said “bomb” on it. After which, he went home and was then robbed himself. What goes around, comes around?
3.McDonald’s might wings. Apparently those wings just were not that mighty or lofty. The fast-food chain giant purchased 50 million pounds of their new product the bone-in chicken wings. However, though you buy it millions will not come. According to news reports, McDonald’s didn’t to sell enough of these mighty wings and now has about 10 million pounds of it left. Instead of selling them at a discounted price, might I suggest pre-holiday free meals at homeless shelters across the country? Interestingly, Ericka Marie Danna out of Oklahoma was found with a pot pipe in her nether regions. Perhaps she can teach that remedial sex ed class?
4. Cat food. A Japanese man by the name of Mamoru Demizu, allegedly went on a $185,000 burglary spree in order to feed 120 cats gourmet food. That’s dedication!
5. Innovative surgeries. Chinese doctors attached a man’s hand to his ankle in order to save his hand. In a bit of a science fiction turn, a factory worker in China had his hand cut off but it was saved by providing him a blood supply from the ankle. It is now reattached where it should be and doctors are optimistic about the hand’s future viability.
6. Phantom pregnancy and soap. In Brazil, doctors performed a C-section on a woman who it turns out wasn’t pregnant after all. She had an enlarged abdomen and nausea so the doctors believed she was pregnant. In my house we refer to that as a “food baby.” Speaking of things that weren’t. A couple driving through Pennsylvania were jailed for a whole month because cops mistook their soap for cocaine. In all fairness, they were going five miles past the speed limit. Shake my head.
7. Funny headlines. Every week there are a few headlines that were inappropriate or mistakenly funny. This week, the headline was about South Carolina’s governor: “Nickky Haley breaks wood with her hands.” Onwards.
8. Scientific breakthroughs and follow up. ADHD, you may have heard, has been increasingly diagnosed over the last few decades. Many believe it is due to the marketing efforts of the pharmaceutical industry. This week, new research was released that found that many ADHD drugs are linked to painful erections. Talk about unintended consequences or are they? It’s one way to get someone’s attention.
9. Extraterrestrials. The internet is abuzz and a flutter about some documents that the Mexican government released this week that purportedly show images of objects that may be proof of contact with ETs. They come from the site of Calakmul, Mexico. Can ET phone home now?
10. Liars. The media stories are chock full of reported lies and misdirections on the part of politicians, leaders and everyday commoners. The media even coined a statement as the “lie of the year.” Imagine if we were to do that at the workplace. What lie would be top on your list? Just in the last two days, I was exposed to 10 workplace lies and I am out on staycation. Can I catch a break? I just wish that liars realized that eventually things do come out and that we are on to you. Eventually karma catches up-keep that in mind. That’s my Christmas gift to you.